Friday, April 22, 2005

Happy Birthday to Me!!

Woo hoo it's my birthday! It's the big 25 today - quarter of a century, blah. I got the drinking started last night - went out on a date - a date who I guess decided he would try to get me drunk, all right by me.

Tonight Nico is taking me out for dinner and then we're heading to the rippers with J-Mo and a bunch of friends. Yes it was Nico's idea to go see some naked women on my bithday. Meh, why not, it's always fun to make fun of the girls on stage! Then we will be heading Squire's, a local pub. I figure it's better to just stay close to home for birthdays, just in case!

Anyhow, have one for me!

Thursday, April 14, 2005

It's been a while...

I know it has been a while. I've been unemployed the last few months and just couldn't find the nerve to blog while I haven't been doing something productive, like having a job! Ha ha.

Anyhow, I would like to announce that April is a great month! I start my new job on Monday, and then it is my birthday on Friday, yes that's right, April 22 - Earth Day.

If you feel like coming out to celebrate, just look for a girl who looks like this:

Ha ha, okay that's not what I look like. Although some of my friends will tell you that I am pretty pale, but not that pasty!! Hope you got a laugh out of it anyways.

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

The longest hangover ever!

Okay, so the last time I talked to you I had a wonderful weekend including binge drinking. Don't worry, I haven't been trapped in a brewery for the last two months. As I realized that my contract at work was coming to a close, I decided that it was probably more beneficial to spend countless hours searching for jobs online, as opposed to blogging. Sorry!

So now I find myself at home and looking for my new career pathway. Isn't it odd that it seemed I had so much more time on my hands when I was blogging while in the office?

This week I have decided to chain myself to my desk in order to make my job search my number one priority (as opposed to staying out late and drinking and smoking). Therefore, this means that I should have a fair bit of time to update the show!

Anyhow, be prepared for some new '05 material, including many references to what I have self-declared as "THE YEAR OF CHANGE."

More to come...

Monday, November 22, 2004

The Hangover

I spent Saturday hungover, what a waste of the weekend. Although the partying Friday night was worth it. Crashed an engagement party, headed over to sleazy bar, and then convinced a friend to have an after party which was so great that I passed out in chair!

I'm going to leave this article here to remind myself about the dangers of drinking. Let it be a lesson for you all!

Memory, learning skills are hindered the next day, study finds

(HealthDayNews) - It's no secret a night of heavy drinking can leave you with a parched mouth, a ferocious headache and an unsteady stomach the next morning. But it can also make it tough to learn new information or recall things you already know, a new study says.

Researchers from Northern Ireland say they've shown that hangovers contribute to memory problems and delayed reaction time, even many hours after last call. The findings may sound obvious, and indeed they "confirm what a lot of people observe about how they function after a night out drinking," said Dr. Robert Cloninger, a professor of psychiatry at Washington University Medical School who studies the effects of alcohol.

What's different about the new findings is that the bodies of most of the study participants had processed all the booze from the night before. Even after their blood-alcohol levels had returned to zero, they still had trouble with basic tasks.

"That's significant because it suggests that if you went out drinking and allowed enough time so that your blood-alcohol concentration was at zero by the time you went to class the next day, you could still have difficulty learning new information," said alcohol researcher Aaron White, an assistant research professor of psychology at Duke University. "These findings suggest that alcohol can affect your ability to learn long after the effects of the drug have worn off."

The researchers enlisted 33 women and 15 men, all "social drinkers," to take part in their study. The subjects underwent memory and coordination testing the mornings after either abstaining or drinking their usual amount of alcohol between 10 p.m. and 2 a.m.

The participants were hardly light drinkers. The women, on average, drank 10.6 "units" per evening when they were allowed to drink; the average for men was 10.5. A "unit" was defined as a glass of wine, a half-pint of beer or a "measure" of liquor.

The findings appear in the November/December issue of Alcohol and Alcoholism.

The morning after drinking, the subjects performed worse on some tests of memory and reaction time than those who didn't drink, although being hung over didn't hurt the performance of the drinkers in all the tests.

As expected, the drinkers didn't feel great, either. "Participants reported hangover effects as measured in terms of fatigue, physical discomfort and emotional disturbance," said study co-author Adele McKinney, a research assistant at the University of Ulster.

The study didn't speculate about how hangovers contribute to lower performance on mental tasks. However, Duke University's White said hangovers have a lot to do with the fact that alcohol simply isn't good for the body.

"People feel sick the next day primarily because they've poisoned their bodies the night before with alcohol," White said. "It's a poison, and it just so happens to be a poison that gives us a nice buzz. But you pay for it. The body must devote energy to processing and removing it."

Even when no alcohol is left in the body, people are still plagued by aftereffects such as fatigue, nausea and dehydration, he said. "All of that is going to make it harder for you to pay attention, to feel like learning and stay awake," he added. "Those things are going to impair your function."
What to do? Of course, you could decide not to drink or at least not drink too much. Downing a glass of water or another non-alcoholic beverage between drinks will slow drunkenness and combat dehydration, White suggested.

But if you do drink too much, the best thing to do the next morning is to take an aspirin, White said. And simply wait for time to pass.

Copyright 2004 ScoutNews LLC. All rights reserved.

Friday, November 12, 2004

These are the cries of the carrots

And the angel of the lord came unto me, snatching me up from my place of slumber. And took me on high, and higher still until we moved to the spaces betwixt the air itself. And he brought me into a vast farmlands of our own midwest. And as we descended, cries of impending doom rose from the soil.

One thousand, nay a million voices full of fear. And terror possesed me then. And I begged, "Angel of the Lord, what are these tortured screams?"

And the angel said unto me, "These are the cries of the carrots, the cries of the carrots! You see, Reverend Maynard, tomorrow is harvest day and to them it is the holocaust."

And I sprang from my slumber drenched in sweat like the tears of one million terrified brothers and roared, "Hear me now, I have seen the light! They have a consciousness, they have a life, they have a soul! Damn you! Let the rabbits wear glasses! Save our brothers!"

Can I get an amen? Can I get a hallelujah? Thank you Jesus.

Life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on........ This is necessary.

It was daylight when you woke up in your ditch. You looked up at your sky then. That made blue be your color. You had your knife there with you too. When you stood up there was goo all over your clothes. Your hands were sticky. You wiped them on your grass, so now your color was green.

Oh Lord, why did everything always have to keep changing like this. You were already getting nervous again. Your head hurt and it rang when you stood up. Your head was almost empty. It always hurt you when you woke up like this.

You crawled up out of your ditch onto your gravel road and began to walk, waiting for the rest of your mind to come back to you. You can see the car parked far down the road and you walked toward it. "If God is our Father," you thought, "then Satan must be our cousin." Why didn't anyone else understand these important things?

You got to your car and tried all the doors. They were locked. It was a red car and it was new. There was an expensive leather camera case laying on the seat. Out across your field, you could see two tiny people walking by your woods. You began to walk towards them. Now red was your color and, of course, those little people out there were yours too.

Thursday, November 11, 2004

Remembrance Day

I hope that you all observed your 2 minutes of silence at 11 a.m. today. I sat quietly in my office and paid homage to all of those who have gone before us, and those who are still with us today that put their lives on the line for our beautiful country. If you have yet to think about this, please take a few minutes out of our day to reflect on how different things are for Canada's youth these days, compared to times of war. Does your life really seem like it is all that bad in comparison?

On another note, I observed another moment of silence for a different kind of remembrance. The ex and I officially began dating on November 11, 2000. So if we had lasted, it would have been four years today. We probably should count back to some odd date in July though, since we snuck around seeing eachother for months, which included me getting picked up around the corner from my house. Word to the wise - don't date your brother's best friend, or ex-best friend, or even friend for that matter.

Anyhow, today I felt like I had so many things I wanted to say to him. But what are you supposed to say? There is no Hallmark card for "It could have been our anniversary today."

I decided that no correspondence was the best choice. Until I got an e-mail:

From: The Asshole
Sent: November 11, 2004 10:36:41 AM
To: me

I really dont know what to say. I guess today could have been special for the both of us but I ruined everything. I never wanted to mention anything or send you an e-mail because I knew it would upset you. I'm so sorry, I'll never forgive myself.


Wednesday, November 10, 2004

Sleaze of the Week

I don’t know why I fail to think things through prior to making a decision. Now I am kicking myself in the ass…

I went to a party over a month ago with my sister who is 21, yet who has friends that are in their thirties. So I went to the 35th birthday party, and needless to say, I felt like a deer caught in the headlights, with most of the women giving me dirty looks, while the guys tried to find any chance to talk to me. I really just wanted to be left alone to drink and talk to my sister, since we rarely go out together.

I ended up having a pretty good night and had a good buzz. I ended up talking to this guy who turned out do be my dad’s foot doctor, and who was friends with the host of the party. I can be fairly entertaining, and people are often shocked at the fact that I am not just another stupid blonde, and can carry on a conversation about politics and health-care industry issues.

Amidst the conversation, he tried to impress me with the fact that he owned a Porsche and also rebuilt older cars, and asked me what my dream car was. To this I replied, "a 63-67 Corvette – the original Stingray." And he said, "that’s good to know, because you never know." Right…

Anyhow, it seems that my dad’s doctor was quite taken with me, although never got my phone number because I rushed out of there before he could ask. He went on a 2 week trip to Florida the following week and phoned the host of the party 3 times from Florida to ask for my phone number.

I found this funny as I am still new to the singles game, and definitely didn’t expect my dad’s 33 year old foot doctor to start coming after me! After he came back from his trip my dad saw him in his practice, and he made mention to my dad that he had the chance to meet his daughter. Okay – what are you thinking here, that my dad is going to help you pick up and hand out my phone number??

Despite not getting a response from my dad, he persisted in trying to get my phone number from the mutual friends. I started feeling bad that they were getting harassed and took his phone number. And I called last week. And we’re (I mean were) supposed to go out for dinner…on Monday that just passed. And I cringe everytime my cell phone rings.

Okay, so some girls may think I’m an idiot for "wasting" the opportunity of going after a rich guy who is obviously looking for his trophy wife. But I don’t need some sleazy doctor to hand things over to me, I’m going to get everything I want on my own.

But one day baby, you will be mine…